“Look, Passat, we’ve got to talk about your, uh, girth. Ever since you moved to Tennessee, things have gotten a little out of hand. I don’t care what Camry is doing. If Camry drove off a bridge, would...don’t you scowl at me! Wait, sorry Taurus. Though you were someone else. You’re slimming down nicely!” » 4/18/15 12:29pm Yesterday 12:29pm

Considering I just murdered my entire family and all my friends, there’s nobody left to judge me. Once the wife’s life insurance pays out, I can finally pave myself a private track that’s perfectly smooth and have all goods and services delivered to me at home. » 4/17/15 10:38am Friday 10:38am